Actually, sir, I thought I would try and bowl half trackers until he hits one straight up in the air. You are too stupid to understand the genius of this kind of attack.

Perhaps I went a bit far in the title, but fuck it.

Nothing pisses me off more as a spinner when someone says, “come on, pitch it up”.

What the fuck do they think I am trying to do, bounce the bastards out?

I’m bowling legspin you fucking simpleton, if it is coming out short, trust me I am trying to fucking pitch it up.

It is like telling a quick bowler off for bowling two foot down the legside, they aren’t trying to do it, so why bring it to their attention.

If I was bowling a foot short, and they thought tactically i should pitch it up i could wear that, but this is when i drop half way and the ball sits up.

Why would be be trying to do that, why do people feel the need to tell me i shouldn’t be doing it, I am not an idiot, i know a bit about cricket, I can tell a shit ball out of my hand, i don’t need some bastard telling me that I have done something wrong.

It just pisses me off.

Leg spin is hard, and sometimes length gets away from you.

But as the bowler, we can tell, the tell tale sign is generally the four the batsmen hits, or the groans of your team mate as the ball hits the middle of the pitch.

If you catch yourself saying pitch it up this year, think it over, is the bowling trying to bowl full and just fucking up, or is it part of some plan to trick the batsmen with half track filth.